Last training?
OK actually I shouldn't have been that bad to Dennis in the previous post. I don't hate him much. I just can't stand his condescending attitude he has towards almost everyone. It's damn shitty. I know no one likes him too, even in his class, but seriously, there's no need to hate him so much as to want him to get retained in Sec3; it's just unorthodox. And being very evil. I must admit that I was gleeful, but I never liked anyone crying. I'd feel bad, and I did try to cheer him up when he went to 3-5. I don't know, but I don't think I'd cheer him up if he breaks down. I don't bother being a hypocrite and acting all-so-concerned, but I'd just say that I detest him. Not to the point of wanting him retained, though there's not much of a harm in him landing in such a predicament. At least to me.Speaking of my previous post, it reminds me of a rather solemn topic which one of my friends raked up during a random conversation. Ethics. I think I'm a morally bankrupt asshole, and that my shittiness was accentuated by my previous post. Either way, let me be a hypocrite and try to change your impression on me, because I'm not really that much of a bastard.
In a vain attempt to portray myself as a good Samaritan, I shall brag about how I helped a kid with his shopping while on the bridge between J8 and the other bus-stop. That was on the Chinese New Year's Eve. I was walking to the other side with my beloved and he was rather cock-eyed while I was bemused by the kid's struggling before offering to help(which he declined at first). Yea, you should see me in a better light now.
Another example is...I don't know. But anyway I think I'd calculate your next PMS, just to let you rant on me if there's a need. There you go. I'm nice.
I can't think of anything else in which I did good in, but there's no point listing out. I remember listening to the priest talking last week(on the leap day) about how you should keep to yourself whatever good things you did, because you'd get your reward in some day, one way or another.
And for non-religious people like me, I get slaps in the face in the form of shunning from friends over stupid things I did. It's my fault and I know it. And there's no point digging my heart of stone out to show you people, because I'd die anyway. Besides, I have a heart of stone and so there's no point in showing you people because it resembles a stone so much(like me). Practicing the art of stonism indeed.
Anyway, who cares whether I get recognition not(I'm trying to be humble)? It's nothing much, really. Why do I even bother with helping that poor kid anyway? What do I get from this? Do I benefit? I felt happier after helping him out. Is this the side-effect, of simply a motive, that I want to help him, not because I care but because I want to feel happy? If my mood swings to the negative end due to my gesture of kindness, would I still help him? If it hurts me to help, would I do so, to a complete stranger? If it inconveniences you, you most probably won't bother doing it.
Sidetrack: I'm in a rather depressing conversation, and the person I'm talking to said stuff that brought a lump to my throat.
a venting machine would be a punching the wall machine, cutting yourself machine, screaming in the pillow machine
the thing is
the wall will never answer you
the scar wont say shit
the pillow wont tell you anything
Urgh. I think I might end up rather depressed too, but no, I won't ever get depressed. Instead, I have to be happier and get my mood to infect the person in question here. I won't get happy or depressed for no reason.
Oh, and I took pictures of the dusted air con. I call it con. Never mind. I took pictures. I'm not complaining, but I think the whole class would report sick on Tuesday after the March Holidays, which isn't really much of a holiday since we have to get back to school like almost every other day.
The proof of the monstrosity about to be perpetrated on us:
It's yellowed. And dusty. To prove my point on its dustiness:
Get my point? I'm not complaining though, just merely stating the facts.
Oh shit I got depressed. Never mind. Let's focus on the vocabulary test we had, and botched. I don't know lah, but it did increase my word bank. I do get to know more words(I hope). And WX's recital of the book last Friday did help. I remembered what does proclivity mean. Muahaha.
And after school, I followed Hubird, Lewis and T-rex to J8, Minitoons, or whatever shit it's called. I felt damn out-of-place, as it's...not a place meant for guys. It'd be better if I'm rather much of a gay shit, with lower testosterone levels, but for a guy with leg hair sprouting, it's weird.
And we had a lot of fun on the bus. I don't know lah, but I think, perhaps, I'd get addicted to going home with people, and talking. I'm being forced out of the shell. Should I like this?
O level Chemistry SPA tomorrow. But we already know the questions. I love Cat High for its unity.
And I hope I won't have to blog about how my friends cheated me.
And I really don't know who visits my blog. From the recent tag-and-chase game played on my blog, I'm getting rather insecure already..not that I care. It's fun, and I like fun things.
Is it just me, or is the weather being unreasonably cold? I can feel my rheumatism acting up once more.
I hope it remains this way. I want mud PT tomorrow. I haven't had one for ages, and am missing the sensation. It's the last training we'd have anyway, and there's no point in not enjoying it. I don't care whether my shirt turns out soiled or not, but I'd be damned if I don't get dirty.
And till now, hardly anyone can decode my MSN nickname. I hope it stays that way.
-- 3/06/2008 08:58:00 PM