So you give up.
There are happy occasions. There are sad occasions.
And with all occasions, there are screw-ups. A happy occasion turns bad because of a screw-up, and a sad, sombre one pisses people off because it's a blatant show of disrespect to the occasion itself.
Tempers run high when things screw-up, when committee members are not devoted enough, when the very 'integrity' of the occasion is soiled.
I hate it when stuff like that happens, it just pisses me off, it destroys the intended meaning, it makes me want to shout FUCK but can't and so I feel like I'm imploding, but that'd be rude and demeaning to the efforts made by my fellow committee members.
But yea, the pressure of occasions can be overbearing. There is no point in them. Keep things simple.
A dinner is just a dinner. No need to complicate things.
Which probably relates to how people react, and get affected, by different things.
Take for example, Travian. I spend hours a day playing this game, getting affected by it whenever I'm getting attacked/lost troops in an attack, and the people around me would be thinking
'Siao ah this guy tio pwn in pixels then so like that, damn jialat game addickt lehx'.
'Why the fuck he wasting time on pixels. like that got use mehx? You mean the stupid pixellized troops can climb out of the computer screen and fight for him mehx?'
and the like. I must admit that Travian does get pointless at times, because there's like nothing to do, and it's pointless and screws studies up. It makes me feel powerless at times when my capital is attacked heavily and my friends and I have not enough troops to defend my capital with, and my capital takes a thrashing, reflecting her IRL.
Does it really matter to me in this world that isn't pixellized? No. Do other people see the significance of my virtual assets/achievements? No. Does it benefit me in any practical way? No.
So why do I play it? Because I like it, because I feel a sense of achievement in the game and perhaps a sense of satisfaction when I attack and destroy the noobs around me.
Because there is a form of commitment that I feel towards the game--after all, I've been playing on this server for 263 days. How can I give up now?
Can any one else relate to this commitment to games?
Which makes me wonder why I wondered how others remain committed to other stuff that seemed inconsequential to me, and thus are more affected by their commitment.
To exaggerate things a little, one can think that, say, America is less important than his own computer. Destroy America if you must, but don't touch my computer.
Or perhaps how a child's yo-yo is more important, more valuable, than a computer.
Or about how the computer to a child is more important than his studies(I am guilty).
So many instances in which humans prioritizes what most people wouldn't, like his Computer over millions of lives, like how an inexpensive yo-yo over the latest technological feat, like how his future is a less pressing a matter than his games.
Moral of the story(I normally have to remind myself)? What seems inconsequential, unimportant, un-prioritized, may take first place in another's heart. Ooh just realized that this could mean a lot of things.
So here's another random thing: Humans are enzymes and substrates.
There are many things which symbolize something to someone. There are humans too. Humans are like substrates, and there are their special enzymatic humans who could react with them. It's like if you're starch and I am RNA polymerase, we don't fucking click, I won't be able to digest you, I won't be able to react with you--only the person who is your amylase could.
Think about the number of times you tried to cheer someone up but failed because you're not that person's enzyme.
So you give up.
And here's another random point: This saying 'Life is not about the number of breaths you take, but about the number of moments that take your breath away' is bullshit.
Does school take my breath away everyday? No. Does stoning in front of my computer everyday take my breath away? No.
Am I still alive? Yes. Is my heart breathing? Yes. Are my biological functions(and weapon) working? Yes.
Up till now I've only proved the saying wrong in the biological sense.
Now let's move on to the spiritual/emotional sense.
Does school take my breath away everyday? No. So why the fuck is it called 'school life'?
Does stoning in front of my computer everyday take my breath away? No. OK I don't really know what they call gamers, virtual life? Never mind. The point before this pwn already.
So let's go on. If school life is us not living, then why is it called school life? Besides that, if that saying were true, then school is in fact stifling our youth, right? It takes away our chance to 'live' by depriving us of the chance to let wondrous things of the world 'take our breaths away'.
In short, education is KILLING us.
Either that, or the saying is totally off.
So this means that the saying is totally off.
I think someone just randomly came up with that statement, and it became famous because it seemed to make perfect sense in the world that the dude lived in, and even in the world now. Which can actually be quite true in a way, but still, I get the feeling that it was said in a spur of moment, and that it was random, and that I could've came up with it myself too if I were there given the right conditions.
Yep I could, like how I could do a lot more other stuff given the right conditions, like rape a girl if she happened to be tied to a tree naked. OK that didn't really make sense and I think that my post won't make any further sense if I tried to protract it.
Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, whatever time you're reading this post in.
-- 8/19/2009 06:00:00 PM
