Revolutionizing Fashion for Men.
Much though we hate to admit it, we as a race are sexist. Of course we are, there's no lying about this. We expect women to dress up as women, and we expect men to dress up as men.
When women dress up as their gender, it's usually quite simple--show off more flesh, strut their boobs, make sure their hour-glass figure is distinctive, et cetera. Some women would make noise and say "NO! We aren't doing this for men", but please lah, in terms of history, men defined women according to their own definitions of beauty. In like the Tang dynasty, men defined fat women as beautiful, and every woman desired to become fat so that they'd be more desirable. Now it's supposedly 'skinny is good' but whatever lah, it's the same principle behind it. Women get their definition of beauty from us, men, who judge them for their beauty.
In short, men define what beauty and attractiveness is to women. Women would go around competing with other women only because they feel that they are threatened by the offender's own dress sense, or physical appeal. These competitions are held because they want to show that they are the most desirable female, and that all men should go for them.
I conclude that women needs the attention of men (who in turn pays attention to whatever hand-held...device they can have, whenever they can).
I am not being sexist in the discriminatory sense here by the way. I do admit that women, in turn, now have a choice as to which male (or female) they wish to mate and produce offspring with. Women define men. In the past, hairier men were selected for as that extra layer of fur is a clear indication of an abundance of testosterone, and that translates to manliness in the past. Now, having that makes one look primitive and selected against, because males are supposed to be more 'metrosexual', 'sensitive', and whatnot in present day society.
Manliness is no longer appealing to the mainstream now, just as much obscenely fat women. Perfectly understandable, definitions change over time.
But then again, I haven't cut into what I wanted to say. Women these days are wearing clothes that accentuates their figure, and this emphasis they are placing on their looks translates into a desire of them to be desirable to other males. They can choose to wear cleavage-revealing clothes, they can choose to wear mini-skirts, they can choose to wear tight-fitting clothes so that every curve of their body can be observed and appreciated by the ogling men (who always ogle).
But what can men wear to make themselves more desirable? There can't be much more than formal, office attire. That we see in the office and other formal occasions all the time, and it's boring. Every man worth his salt wears those. It's boring, move on.
So this begs the question: What makes a man desirable?
Ans: Huge penis.
Now the little girls will shy and blush and say 'Nooooo', but that's the truth. Males with huge penises are selected for, no matter the hair or face or whatever negative attributes they have. Because women have needs. Don't argue with me on this: Women have needs, women are horny, and women are hornier than men.. Let's just say that in my mountainous retreat, whenever office hours are over, I can observe throngs of women walking around almost half-dressed. And that's in the CBD. All those mini-dresses, and aforementioned asset-revealing clothes, are all donned by women.
Why hasn't clothings designed to accentuate the figure of a man been made?
Batman has armour, and from what we see, his armour has got 6-packs smithed into them. Being and looking fit is one attribute men cannot miss out on, and this is probably what allows Batman to enter every girls' wet dreams:
Simply hot.
But 6-packs alone isn't enough. Like I've said, what makes women happy most is a big dick. Until now, no one has ever tried to do anything as novel, as radical as I have. Presenting to you a new fashion icon of 2010:
Huge. I know.
Yep, you got that right. Undergarments for men that can place extra emphasis on their man-meat, and pants that hugs around said undergarments such that everything comes to light. Women will now have to suffer from more moist-pangs while walking from Point A to Point B, as they would have to stare (because it's within their biological system to mate too) at wonderful samples of men surrounding them.
I call this the Penile Code.
Skimpily-dressed women are so common, and distracting, it's time men came up with something that is actually comfortable, showy, yet not ball-destroying. Men shouldn't wear women's clothes. Skinny jeans was created for women.
Another fashion icon I'd like to introduce to you guys is this:
Now let me get this straight. I am no fan of Crocs or whatever else they produce, and frankly speaking I think this pair of slippers suck, but I think that slippers could be as much of a fashion icon as the Penile Code.
Slippers have had a major role in manga too. Look at this manly picture of Shanks (you'd have to click this damned thing):
And here's a picture of Rayleigh:
Coincidence? I think not. One common misconception people have towards people wearing slippers is that they are slack. Well, to be honest, that's not a misconception, but that doesn't characterize all our actions, so don't be too judgmental against people wearing slippers :c
I think Oda's choice of this attire for such um powerful men is that slipper-wearers normally have a lot of potential, except that people can't put it past their appearance to realize said potential.
In conclusion: People wearing slippers have a higher chance of conquering the world.
Guys, watch me conquer the world with my slippers >)
-- 10/30/2010 01:58:00 AM