Post ORD Trip: Bangkok Jam
People have post ORD trips, and I'm no exception. The country of choice is Thailand, Bangkok, and to be honest I was really hyped up because I wanted to see the ping pong show.
There's this night market called Patpong, and you can wiki it to see what we were dealing with. I never knew about go go bars, where the girls are pretty and actually rather desirable, and they can speak Chinese and English on top of their own Thai, but are prostitutes and don't make for good conversations because, well, they have very few questions. A typical conversation at such a go go bar would be
Girl: Hello
You: Hi
You: Hi
Girl: So where are you from/What's your name?
You: Wherever you're from/Whatever's your name
Girl: I'm -real common English name-
You: Hello -real common English name-
Girl: You wanna go up and have sex?
No I'm serious my girl was talking to me and suddenly that question was popped and I was scared and angry because I was looking for a meaningful conversation and all that I got in return was a desire for my penis and/or money. She even used Chinese: 你要不要上楼做爱?
And all I could do was shake my head and say no no no no no no no no no.
After that she didn't bother with me anymore.
Thailand is too intense with all the bargaining
"No no no, this wholesale price."
..."But for you, special price!"
The taxi drivers are out for blood too. It's best you don't try to get him to switch on the cab meter, if you do, they will drive the longer way and take you for a ride, wasting your time and getting you to pay more than you have to normally if you had just bargained.
Cab fares should normally be less than 150 baht, and if you're really aggressive, 100 baht would do. Really. Anything more than 150 is a rip-off like most of everything else.
Oh and in case you're interested in doing something special at red light districts, the girls at the go go bar that you can get: 3k baht. Maybe you could bargain and ask for lower price because I'm guessing there's no such thing as wholesale price in prostitution, so you can get a special price immediately. My other friend got to know that a special massage is 1k baht for the full service of both a massage (normally a noob, unsatisfying massage), and full sexual services. This is otherwise known as a lapsup massach.
But if you're looking to get laid in Thailand you can simply go clubbing, the girls there are wild and dick-crazy. If I was able to get high I might have gotten myself caked in STDs already, but thankfully/unfortunately getting high is not my forte. I did see strangers pulling females into the male toilets while the toilet attendants stood guard outside the cubicle for them. It was an interesting sight.
And there's always snorkeling at Pattaya. There are so many half naked pictures of me now, I should un-tag myself before all my female friends start clamouring for my body. =\
 |
| Too hot. |
Anyway, at Pattaya, there's this club where there's no dance floor but there's a live band and I'd like to say that I can't get enough of live bands. I remember trying to get high and drinking quite a bit, and drinking too quickly, but still I could not get high. My point is, I did puke, so I guess from here on out I can only say that I'm "vomit-free since 2013", which does sound much better than "vomit-free since 2006". At least it rhymes.
Seriously I cannot get enough of live bands. Really.
And the alcohol there is too cheap I drank too much now I don't want no more alcohol for awhile :c
I need to be more disciplined.
-- 3/27/2013 07:12:00 PM